Escaping the Cult of the Weed

By Marisa Broughton, MCHT, MNLP

As all smokers do at some point, I too considered giving up the weed. It was expensive, cumbersome and made me cough. Not to mention, there were fewer and fewer places that would allow smoking and I was getting tired of planning my day around my cigarettes.

Many people told me it would be difficult to quit smoking. They told me that I would gain weight and that I would be unable to handle emotional, especially stressful, situations. They said that I wouldn’t know what to do with my hands and that if I had a drink of alcohol, my resolve would weaken. As I listened to all of this, I took a good look at the enemy - whom you’d think was as big as a grizzly bear or as formidable as Mount Everest and realized that the fear of the anticipated reprisal for quitting was similar to that of one thinking of leaving a cult.

The Cult of the Weed is an appropriate description of the mindset that I had bought into being a smoker. I was brainwashed and oddly enough, I was the one that did it to myself. Sure, I had help reinforcing the programming (the beliefs of the other members of the cult) – from my fellow smokers.

When I had tried to quit before, what had convinced me to return to the cult was the convincing arguments that my inner dialogue presented. Sure, my body experienced the sensations of craving and coupled with the inner dialogue describing the sensations that I was missing out on and so  I gave in – time and time again.

What was different this time was that I was approaching the cult from a different perspective. Instead of preparing for the grand battle, I became an explorer on a mission of discovery. I became  very curious about the power of the cult and even more curious to see what would truly happen to me if I didn’t smoke. I approached the situation from a third person perspective – an observer, a scientist. I found myself looking forward to the first craving because suddenly  abstaining became a game to me. My inner resolve (my true will) vs. the cult (the cigarette habit which resided in some other part of my psyche).

When you examine the cult more closely, you discover that it has a lack of  physical power. That cigarette is not an entity. It has no personality or mystical powers. The only ability the cult has is the power of illusion. Whether you buy into the illusion or not depends on what you believe about cigarettes and the habit. If you are unsuspecting, you can also be influenced by other members’ of the cult and their beliefs as well. There you all sit huddled around the fire afraid that if someone took away your cigarettes, you would somehow spontaneously combust or turn into raving lunatics losing all self control. Illusion does have great power while you are under its spell. It is only when you recognize the illusion for what it is, the beliefs lose their power.

I was willing to take the chance of spontaneous combustion or lunacy for the sake of science. I really wanted to know the extent of the cult’s ability to enslave me. I thought about what that said of me as a person if I resigned myself to enslavement without even knowing if I could walk away a free woman.

So I began the vigil. The craving came and I allowed myself to feel it fully. I marveled at the sensation, recognizing where it began in my body and where it went. How long it lasted. What made it stronger or weaker. I listened to the internal dialogue with amusement. I was amused because when I listened to it from this perspective, I found it funny how convincing of an argument it presented. I say "it" but "it" really is me. Given that, I was rather impressed at my ability to be so determined and persuasive. I made a note to self to remember that I had this ability and perhaps could put it to better use, like negotiating a raise or better price on something. I was able to resist temptation because I wasn’t fighting the craving, I was waiting to see what would happen if I didn’t give in. So far, nothing more than the internal dialogue.

Now this internal dialogue began to take on a personality. I mused over how at first it was convincing and when I wasn’t buying into the argument, it actually started nagging. It reminded me of a child who is in a store and wants something. You know how they get really repetitive, whinny and persistent? Well, that is the persona my internal dialogue took on. It really could have been annoying but for some reason, I thought it was funny, probably because I knew it wasn’t going to work. I took on a viewpoint that I didn’t care what it said, I wanted to wait and see what would happen if I didn’t smoke.

Stress appeared. My sister was in labor and I was there to lend emotional support. I couldn’t smoke in a hospital anyway and I certainly didn’t want to leave her side, so having a cigarette was out of the question. Oddly enough, the internal dialogue knew this and left me alone. We got through the situation and I witnessed the birth of my first niece.

When I got home, I went to the freezer, where I kept the tobacco and almost gave in to the voice which kept saying, "Hey, it’s a special occasion. You can celebrate it with a cigarette." Just as I reached for the tobacco, I paused and said to myself, "Ya, I could have a cigarette and justify it. There is no one stopping me. Then again, if I did that, I would have to start the experiment all over again." At this point, when I really thought about it, it would be more of a hassle to "quit" again and replay the first part of the game, then to carry on with the mission.

Weeks went by and the internal dialogue either grew weaker or I stopped paying attention to the babble. If I had the NLP knowledge that I have now, I merely would have found the mute switch and used it. Unfortunately I had to do it the hard way and learned to withdraw my attention from it.

I never did spontaneously combust, nor did I turn into a ranting and raving mad woman. I didn’t lose my temper any more than usual and my eating habits remained the same. Coffee tasted a bit strange at first, but that also passed. I did avoid alcohol because I wasn’t willing to take the chance because I knew that alcohol does lower your inhibitions and I needed to stay strong. I was able to be around others who smoked because I wasn’t fighting a battle, I was making a choice. Sure, seeing someone else smoke may trigger a craving, but I knew that I could survive a craving. A craving is a desire to have something. There is huge power in knowing that you can have a craving and survive not fulfilling it.

It’s been thirteen years since I left the Cult of the Weed. My experiment yielded some interesting wisdoms that I’d like to pass on to those of you considering escaping to the smoke free – and truly "free" world:

•  You can be calm without a cigarette. Nicotine is actually a stimulant and actually, smokers are more excitable and not calmer people than nonsmokers.

• Smoking gives people a reason to take a break. You can still take a break and not smoke. It’s not the cigarette that decides you want a break, it really is you making that decision.

•  You will find other things to do with your hands, naturally. It’s okay to even do nothing with your hands, just fold them on your lap, sit on them – whatever, it’s all okay and no one notices or really cares.

• When you have a craving, take a deep breath and hold that breath for a few seconds before releasing it. It does two things. One, taking deep breaths calms you down because you get extra oxygen and two, when you take that deep breath you are releasing some nicotine from your lungs. It will take a while before that clears out and you may as well take advantage of it. By the time your lungs clear of the stored nicotine and tar, you will have been smoke free for some time.

•  Avoid playing the game that you can have one drag or only one cigarette. If you even take one drag, you will have to begin the quitting process all over again. Ask yourself before you take that drag, is it really worth giving up all you have accomplished so far?

• For the one time that you do slip up, remember that slip up doesn’t mean give up. Begin the process again. Begin the process as many times as you need to until you get so sick of beginning the process that you stick with it.

•  If you replace cigarettes with pot, you still belong to the Cult of the Weed. Nothing has changed except the substance and yes, pot (in it’s own way) is just as addicting as cigarettes.

•  Examine your beliefs about smoking. Listen to the internal dialogue and the arguments that have been used to keep you enslaved. Really think about the subject of power and how much power the cult actually has over you.

•  Look for the illusions that have fooled you up to now. Try the experiment and experience for yourself how strong and able you are to live a peaceful life free from the cult.